Dreams

.. did you ever have one of THOSE dreams?

The ones where you wake up and remember EVERYTHING?

O! M! G!

I had THE dreams of dreams earlier ..

I slept most of the day .. for two reasons.

1) I was up all night again so I didn’t actually go to bed until 10:30am

and

2) I was pissed off and torqued and all those other adjectives that applies to being pissed.

Just the thumbnail:

When Chief’s alarm went off yesterday morning and I was MORE then awake, I figured I would take the dogs out and give him a few extra minutes in bed. Nice of me, right? MORE then nice of me considering there’s still snow up to my knees out there.

Anyway..  I take the dogs and see that that’s crap all over the dining room and the kitchen is a wreck.

You, know.. the usual. Hmph!

And because Bubba’s lump of flesh is sleeping on the couch.. and because I don’t pay an obscene amount of money every month for his room to have him sleep on the couch .. I decided to go about cleaning the kitchen and living room in my normal pissed off manner (ie: banging doors.. talking out loud to myself.. etc.

Weed gets up and comes downstairs.. Chief gets up asks me what I’m doing.. I wave my hands around like a mime on crack like, “… what the HELL do you think??” .. and go back to wiping the floor down  with WAY too much Pine Sol!!

Have I mentioned that they hate the smell of Pine Sol??

HE thinks I’m talking about Bubba on the couch so he says something to him.. Bubba grunts an answer.. but goes into his room. I finish with the floor and then proceed to stomp around the living room and dining room picking up the fucking bottle caps.

Bottle caps. How many DAMN times have they been told about the fucking bottle caps?

So I say to Chief.. To Weed.. To Spaz in the shower and Bubba in his room:

See all the soda on the front porch? Tomorrow is trash and I’m throwing every single fucking one out!

Chief is all Yea! Yea! I hate those bottle caps! I keep telling you guys about the bottle caps!!

He goes into the bedroom .. I go out into the living room and then he comes out and says (you’re going to love this):

I hate waking up to you with a stick up your ass

And not in a I-feel-you-pain kind of way. HE sounded pissed and I was like, are you kidding me?? Really?

So I said .. I hate BEING UP ALL NIGHT WITH A STICK UP MY ASS!

He then asked me what my problem is and I said nothing has changed in four years.

Right away he was like, “No.. that’s not it” and I was like, “.. are you kidding me, dude? You asked.. I told you and now you’re saying I’m wrong? You know what? Think whatever you want to think.”

And then I didn’t talk to him for the remaining time I was up .. because when I get pissed like that.. when I know that I can’t have the conversation that needs to be had because you just want to believe that everything is full of rainbows and kitten kisses and don’t want to deal with reality, then why waste my time. I’m only going to get more pissed and say things that shouldn’t hit the air.

So that’s why I slept as long as I did.

At any rate…

So I had this dream.

We were at my grandmother’s old house is South Philly .. a huge three story corner property. Weed comes in with a girlfriend who kind of  looks familiar in real life but I don’t know who she is.. and then they’re followed by another boy and another girl.

They say something about having to take a bus to Montuak (I have no clue!) in the morning and they were going to stay over at the house. I’m fine with that.

Next thing I know, there are like.. 6 or 7 more of his friends over.

For some strange dream-reason, I’m fine with that too.

The sleep sofa I used to have in my old house is in one of the two middle rooms. Someone let’s it be known to me that two of the girls are going to sleep on that for a reason that escapes me. I immediately start pulling the bed out and realize that there’s something missing inside of it that makes the mattress dip but I remember thinking it’s sturdy and these are skinny little heroin-chic girls so I’m not worried.

I start making the bed and one of the girl’s says “.. oh, you don’t need to put a four part sheet set on there?” and I’m like, why not?.. and she tells me that whatever part is missing… is in fact, missing.. and they won’t be using it.

I explain that it’s not going to make a difference and she starts jumping on it to make sure..

Next thing I know.. and it does get fuzzy here.. is that I find out that they carry the sofa upstairs to the third floor where Weed’s room is and I freak out.. What the $%*((? How could you let them do that??? ect. ect. etc.

That’s followed by Spaz screaming that Weed is beating him up .. I run upstairs (for some reason the railing was missing) and go into Spaz’s room.. pull off Weed.. push him back towards his room and tell Spaz that I really like his bedroom and maybe he should stay up here permanently.

No clue!! LoL

Then Weed is behind me again yelling something and then I started yelling at him that I don’t care if he lives here but when he’s fucked up he turns into a monster .. and with those words, his hair started to stand up on end like a Michael Myers mask and his face gets all red and bloated and he starts yelling something.

And then it’s back downstairs and everybody is packing up and leaving and then Snooki and JWoww walk in and I’m talking to them about something when two of girls come back and start talking serious smack to The Snook and Woww.

Uh-uh!! Not having THAT..

So I get all up in this girls grill and tell her.. in the ghetto way.. how she’s not going to disrespect Snooki and JWoww and I’ll take her skinny little heroin chic ass out side and give her a beat down.

And then I woke up …

I won’t go into the OTHER dream I had where I was dating a guy that looked like Ceaser from The Fashion Show and he jumped into a lake to get cranberries.

That one was just too freakin’ weird!