Posts Tagged ‘High School’

.. so very early this morning, I called the head teacher for the alternative schooling program at Bubba’s high school.

I left him a message saying that I would appreciate a call back because we’re having an extremely difficult time getting Bubba to do his school work and that his lack of seriousness has caused him to fail the semester of courses that had been on the lesson plan.

I wanted to know two things:

1. How do we get him back into school

2. Where is he at academically now that he failed the online semester of work and had failed some courses at the end of 9th grade.

I mean really, is this kid still going to be in high school at 22? I’m never going to be able to get rid of him.

After the call, I had left the folder labeled “Bubba’s Cyber School” on the dining room table. And a little later, Chief saw it and asked me why it was there. I told him that I called the teacher and left a message for him.

Bubba got up at 10:30 and I immediately heard him talking on the computer. So he didn’t get right up and do school work.. he got right up and started playing the online game he’s obsessed with. I didn’t say anything to Chief then.. I wanted to see just what HE was going to say about it .. if anything.

I really need to learn that I always have my answers before I ask the questions.

I wound up falling asleep because I had been up all night but around noon, my cell phone rang and Chief answered.

It was the teacher.

Ok. Let’s see how he handles this.

He tells the teacher about the situation.. I hear the teacher say that there are a “few things” that can be done and then I hear Chief say “.. Oh! Yea.. that sounds like something we were thinking about.” and I’m like Huh????

So I still under the blankets and stretch and make like I’m just waking up. Chief ends the call and tells me it was the teacher.

And??

… well.. AND the teacher tells him that there is an independent study program that Bubba can get into. He’ll have to go to school three days a week from 10 until noon and the other two days he’ll be home doing the online school. He would also have online school to complete the three days he attended the class but it would help him catch up.

And I stared at him thinking, “… are you REALLY that much of a moron?”

He tells me that he thinks that’s the perfect solution.

Ok.. you already answered my question. You ARE REALLY that much of a moron.

So I say to him.. yknow.. um.. and how are you STILL going to get Bubba to do the school work here? Who exactly is going to be checking over his shoulder? Do you REALLY think that after spending two hours at school he’s going to come home and do ANOTHER two hours when you can’t even get him to do what he has to do now?

He stared at me.. with that stupid empty look on his face.

So I continued saying that wouldn’t it be ALOT better to have him back in school full time and have him work towards doing the independent study? You know.. like giving him a GOAL? And btw… just WHAT is he doing on the computer now? Playing his online game? So like.. did anything REALLY affect him at dinner last night? Do you really think he GETS it? No.. he doesn’t.. because he knows your his bitch.. if you weren’t, you wouldn’t be so concerned with appeasing him you’d be making the right decisions for him.

His reply?

“..well, the teacher sounded like they didn’t even want him back”

And I was like I DON’T GIVE A FLYING HUNK OF CHEESE WHETHER THEY WANT HIM BACK OR NOT.. HE NEEDS TO GO BACK AND THEY HAVE TO TAKE HIM BACK AND YOU SHOULD HAVE SAID THAT .. NOT MAKE ME HAVE TO TELL YOU AND THINK THAT YOUR A COMPLETE AND UTTER MORON

He leaves the room and I hear him, very sweetly, tell Bubba to do his school work.

And I just shook my head and rolled my eyes and went back under the covers to sleep. Useless.

I got up around 5pm just as Chief was leaving the house to go to the supermarket .. Bubba was still talking on the computer so I checked the reports online .. he had only completed 2 hours worth of work. Just under 2 hours but I’ll throw him a bone.

So at that point, he’s been on the 7.5 hours and just 2 hours of work.

And this independent study is going to fly?

Yea..

Sure it is…

I was so torqued that I wasn’t in any frame of mind to have the “discussion” I wanted to have today.. in fact, if my car wasn’t surrounded by the Wall of Snow, I would have gone over Bird’s and hung out with her an Baby Faith..

It’s still on the agenda though.. I’m not letting this one fly.

 

 

Ooooohhhh Bubba! You just COULDN’T do it, couldja?

I posted before about Bubba currently being in cyber school ..

I posted before about how it takes a certain type of parent to have a kid in cyber school..

Both parent and child, in my NOT so humble opinion, need to be mature enough and concerned enough to make it work..

Neither applies to Bubba and Chief.

It’s been a CONSTANT struggle to get Bubba to take this seriously and not stay up all hours of the night playing online games.. waking up past noon the following day and only putting a sporatic hour or so of time into his schoolwork between updating his Facebook status, taking calls on Skype and watching YouTube videos.

But Bubba will only do what you let him get away with and Chief LETS him get away with doing all of the above. Not that he wants to, mind you.. he’s just ill-equipped to do what he needs to do to be a strong, respected force in Bubba’s life.

And NOTHING grabs my goat more..

With this particular cyber school program, you can sign in and create very, very detailed reports showing you exactly what your child was working on.. when he was working on it and how long he was working on it ..

I present to you the following exibits:

Notice the test score... nice, huh?

Notice the time spent on each lesson .. super duper!!

Mind you, I would create these reports four.. five.. six times daily whenever Bubba insisted that he did his work .. then I’d show them to Chief.. and Chief would say something to him like, “.. you didn’t spend enough time, Bubba” or “.. you need to get more work done, Bubba” .. to which Bubba would say “ok” and Chief would leave the room and Bubba would go back to doing whatever it was he was doing.

Complete ineffective.

Just as ineffective as Chief falling asleep at around 10pm.. waking up at midnight.. telling Bubba that he needed to get off the computer and then go back to sleep ..

There is also Bubba attitude .. if I talked to my father in the manner that he does, my father would have gladly called CPS himself after he beat me silly.

But then, I had respect for my father. Bubba doesn’t have respect for his … and it isn’t entirely Bubba’s fault that he doesnt.

So Bubba had a full semester of classwork that needed to be completed by January 28th and 29th.

He had two months to do it.

Very little was done.

So when he finally decided that he was going to put serious time in, guess what? The courses had been removed. Not that he would have had the time to complete what he needed to complete.. but now he had no way of working on them so I’m sure that’a a BIG F in his transcript.

Today though.. was the final straw. For me.

Bubba got up at 11:30.. I know this because as soon as he got up he started arguing with Spaz about getting on the computer.

Because of this stupid neck thing I had/have, my sleep schedule is more fucked up then it normally is so I was in my bedroom settling in for a nap.

I got up at around 4pm. I heard Bubba talking and figured he was online playing the game he’s obsessed with and immediately logged into the cyber school system to see what work he had completed.

17 minutes.

While his father was up and roaming around doing whatever he was roaming around doing .. While he was up for 6 HOURS.. he only did 17 FUCKING MINUTES  of work.

And believe me.. I blame BOTH of them.

So I tell Chief that Bubba only did 17 FUCKING minutes of school work and he promptly leaves the bedroom.. asks Bubba how much work he did .. Bubba said something like “.. he’s going to get to it” .. and then Chief came back into the bedroom.

I waited about 20 minutes, went out into the kitchen to get water for to take my pills and saw Bubba still playing his online game and not only THAT but he also had one of his friends sitting next to him on his own laptop playing the same game.

Okkkaaayyyyyy…

5:15 rolls around.. the friend leaves. I check the cyber school reports again.

ME: What time are we eating dinner.
CHIEF: I was thinking about 6:30
ME: Ok.. because it’s a quarter after 5 now and Spaz gets on the computer at 7.. which means that Bubba  has less then two hours to do his work and he STILL only spend 17 minutes on it.. even after you told him at 4 o’clock to get on it.
CHIEF: Show me.

Excuse me? EXCUSE ME you inept sorry-assed son of a bitch of a father?? SHOW YOU??? Did I NOT show you at 4? Have I not been SHOWING YOU SINCE NOVEMBER????????????????

But I refrained from saying that out loud.

Instead, I pulled out my laptop and showed him and he stomped out and confronted Bubba and very loudly told him to get on the school work.

Then he went into the kitchen to start making dinner.

I went out to the living room to start putting the clothes away that I had folded earlier in the morning.. because they were STILL sitting on the dining room table and nobody did anything with them. Let’s just say I wasn’t in a pleasant mood.

And while I was meandering between the living room and the linen closet and the living room and the kitchen and the living room and my bedroom.. guess what?

Bubba was still online with his friends sending YouTube links for the newest Eminem videos.

And more then just my goat had been gotten.

I went in the kitchen and told Chief that this was it.. he’s going back to regular school. That all this was beyond ridiculous.. Bubba was still doing what he wanted to do and if it was me, I would go out there and pull the damn plug for the computer.

There were many times that I wanted to pull that plug but in this house, with these kids, with him as a father.. I have no control. I should, mind you. But I learned a long time ago that Chief would very much like me to be the “bad” guy with his kids so he could be the “good” guy and sorry, Bucky .. I may do a lot, but I’m not letting you off your parental duties. They’re your kids.. you need to grow a spine and do what your suppose to do. We’ve been through this time and time and time and time again.. I’m not going to waste my time trying to break them of their bad habits and not have him backing me up… because all that does is label me the “bitch” and sorry, not going to happen.

Chief says that sending Bubba back to regular school is fine by him and when we sit down to dinner… he tells Bubba that he’s going back to regular school and he ruined his opportunity.. none of this is new.. it’s been going on for months.. blah blah blah blah blah..

And then.. AND THEN.. he says:

LOOK, I’M NOT TRYING TO CONTROL YOU

And I freaked.. FA-REEKED…

I slammed my opened palm on the table and said.. very loudly I might at…

HE’S 16.. YOU’RE HIS FATHER.. YOU’RE SUPPOSE TO CONTROL HIM.. IT’S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY AS A PARENT..

And then to Bubba, I said:

You got it ALL figured out don’t you? You KNOW that he tells you to do school work and then goes into the other room… You KNOW that he tells you to get off the computer and then goes back to sleep .. You didn’t want to go to school.. You wanted to get up when you wanted and go to sleep when you wanted and play online all day and you played me because I was the one who convinced your father that you could do it.. Me.. And what did you do? The first week, you kept up your end of the bargain because you knew that as soon as all eyes were off you, you were going to do what you wanted.

And then I turned to Chief and told him that he was the one that let it happen.. because no matter how many times I showed him.. no matter how many times I told him.. he just ignored it as much as Bubba did.

Nobody said anything.

Wait.. I take that back.

Chief said something about Bubba only being able to do school work on the computer and Bubba saying something about him not being allowed on the computer to do other things and then Chief started to raise his voice about whatever because frankly, it doesn’t matter what he says. He doesn’t have the spine to stick to anything and Bubba knows it.

At some point, I also brought up the fact that since Bubba isn’t being properly supervised with his school work, the district is going to drag Chief into court about it.. it’s something they do here that goes beyond cyber school .. you can get a notice to appear in court if your kid doesn’t do his homework three nights in a row.. You’d think that this was like THE best school district and that they are diligent with educating their students when in fact this is THE WORST school district in the state… but that’s neither here nor there..

You have to remember this too…

Last October when Bubba wanted to go live with the Crack Whore because he didn’t like my rules.. she went to the district and had the address changed on their school records. That was a HUGE things at the time because all she did was go in with her lease and changed the address. When we found out about it a few months later :: her address turned up on Spaz’s report card :: and Chief called to have the address changed back, he was told that they weren’t “allowed” to do that without custody papers.

It was just this whole bunch of craziness because they let HER change it but once confronted with their error, now they insisted on doing things by the book.

Did he have his custody papers? No.

Have I been telling him since then to inquire about getting them? Yes.

Has he? No.

Another thing that he just lets fall by the wayside .. I can’t get them. HE has to.

So the Crack Whore’s address is still listed on their school records so IF the school is sending anything home about Bubba’s lack of effort .. do you REALLY think she’s going to forward them here?

Not a fucking chance.

At this point, I just feel like they will all get what they deserve. Each and every one of them.

Later on today, I plan on sitting Chief down and having a non-confrontational discussion about him.. his parenting and his kids. I’m tired of him mentally being absent and hiding behind whatever emotion he hide behind. I am also going to be point blank and frank with ALL his kids at dinner.. about their lack of respect.. about their attitudes.. about their selfishness and a whole host of other things.

And then I’m done.. I will have done all that I can do.

Oh.. and it’s going to toll for Bubba in the morning, I’ll tell you what!!

I didn’t have a chance to go through my emails today .. the landlord is coming over on Tuesday with the county licensing people so I wanted to make sure everything was the way it’s suppose to be.

Anyway.. I got this email about 4 hours ago from Bubba’s teacher:

Hello,

Here is the email that I sent to [Bubba’s] mother just a few minutes ago.

[Bubba] had a rough few days to end the week. I am sending you the exact same information that I sent to her since I am not 100% sure who [Bubba] is living with at this current moment in time

[Bubba] had a few incidents on Thursday that I am going to explain to you first. He had an off day in almost every class. His morning started with him showing up late to school. When he got to first block he fell asleep and was snoring loudly. He was finally woken up by his teacher and asked to go out on a pass. She told him to do his work since he has been sleeping and then he could go out on a pass, he got upset with her and didn’t do much work. In his second block he locked another student in a closet and was also found with silly string. There was silly string sprayed all over the hallway before second block…no one saw [Bubba] doing it but he did have a can of it on him (as far as I know no one is making a big deal out of this). He then got to my class (where I actually didn’t know any of this had happened) and he moved his seat away from distractions which I thought was good. The students were then working on some proportion problems and [Bubba] did nothing, even when I did the work on the board he wasn’t doing much. I then caught him shooting rubber bands at another student across the room. I believe his last class was fine.

On Friday we did Fun day so the 9th graders spent most of the day in the gym doing different games. He sat in the gym without a problem. When the students went back to their classrooms for a little before we had a pep rally (it was homecoming) [Bubba] walked into his room and handed his teacher a piece of paper that was covered in brown paint. He told her “they didn’t have any toilet paper in the bathroom” and placed it on her desk. Needless to say she did not find this humorous.

I will say that [Bubba] has been doing wonderful in his afternoon sessions with me (which I had to cancel Thursday due to a meeting) but his effort in my actual class is dropping. He is pretty much doing nothing in my room. I just wanted to keep you updated on what happened because he definitely had a few issues. I am hoping, along with [Bubba’s] other teachers, that this behavior does not continue in the future. Let me know if you have any questions.

Nice, right? So everything about what Weed was saying :: that the Crack Whore allows him to do whatever he wants to do .. that he’s on the computer all night.. that he has no supervision, etc. :: is true.

I was over at Bird’s house earlier so when I came in, Chief was already asleep and given the density of his snoring, he isn’t going to retain anything if I wake him up and tell him about the email .. so I’ll tell him in the morning.

I can’t tell you what he’s going to do… I can tell you what he’s going to SAY .. I can tell you how he’s going to go off on a tangent about how she’s nothing but this or that.. AND I can also tell you that he’ll say that to ME but I’m not sure what exactly he’s going to DO about it or what he’s going to say to HER.

I’ll have to update you tomorrow on that..

I’m not going to lie and say that I want Bubba back here. My house has been calm .. and clean.. and Spaz has been actually benefiting from not having the constant torment.

I’m not going to lie and say that I have the same feeling for Bubba that I did before. He’s not my kid and I don’t have to love him. I don’t have to care about him or his needs.

But I will tell you that that isn’t beneficial to anyone.. and because he isn’t my kid, I really can’t say too much about where he lives or what Chief decides :: or doesn’t decide :: to do about it.

If he does come back here.. and if he WAS my kid :: which it wouldn’t be because I would have NEVER let things get so out of hand :: I would take him to school.. pick him up from school and banish him to his bedroom. I’d even camp out in front of it if I had to.. no video games.. on computer.. no laptop.. no fucking nothing. Call me old-school but that’s the way I was raised and I think my parents did a pretty nifty job!

So I’ll just have to go with the flow and manage the damage.. and if it takes me having to run the store so Chief can be home in the afternoons to keep an eye on him then so be it..

Because, after all.. he’s HIS kid.. not mine.

Feel free to comment.. especially if you’re a step parent to a problematic teenager. Is there something more I should be doing? Do I have the right to feel the way I do?

Given the state of the public school district that currently holds the responsibility of educating Bubba and Spaz, there’s no doubt that it pales in comparison to a Catholic / Private education.

NOTE: Bubba and Spaz being idiots aside. I did give the district a curve because I realize the challenge they have with these to.

I am a product of Catholic school. I went from K to 12.. not counting my Baptist nursery school and Jesuit collegiate experiences.

Mind you, I graduated high school 20-something years ago but I do know from my friend’s experiences with THEIR kids that it didn’t change too much. But with the public school here, I can’t believe the leniency that goes on. I understand that for some teachers who want to be more stringent, their hands are tied. But then, what exactly are you providing for the child?

Not sure if this is a public school thing as a whole or just where I live but they will “socially” pass a student into the next grade meaning that if the kid is deemed “too old” to repeat a particular grade then they will pass him so that his psyche doesn’t get damaged.

Are you KIDDING me?

You’re worried about their psyche but not that they can’t do simple mathematics in their head??

I don’t really understand this whole concept of I.E.P (Individualized Education Program ) .. According to the US Department of Education (Office of Special Education and Rehabilitative Services) .. a public school kid who receives special ed and related services under IDEA (Individual Disability Education Act) MUST have an I.E.P.

I know Spaz is in “special” classes.. it’s called “Social.. something or other” .. but Bubba isn’t. I never asked Chief WHY or HOW they got involved in this.. was it at a school administrator’s instance? But regardless that’s what they’re in.

The thing is.. as I’m reading this 40 page document the USDE put out in July 2000.. I just think it’s a bunch of crap.

To me, all it does is serve to highlight a students weakness and cater to it. It’s like with Spaz and his atrocious spelling. The kid can’t spell or read at his grade level :: or AGE level for that matter :: and it’s because the teachers in his SPECIAL classes allowed AND condoned :: mind you :: phonetic spelling.

For example, this kid doesn’t know how to spell OR recognize the word KNIFE because he spells is NYF.

I had discussion after discussion after discussion with his teachers about this… like, they’re always spitting out about how it is their goal to get the kids back into mainstream classes. My argument is “.. how are you going to do that if you keep condoning phoenetic spelling?”

No answer. Blank stare.

Sorry.. I went SO down a different path!! But it’s frustrating.

Anyway.. so Friday when I stopped at the store after work, Bubba was there. He was telling us what his recent test schools are and it looks like he very well MAY be graduating 8th grade.

I told him that he has ONE year in the public high school he will be going to.. if he starts messing up or not doing what he’s suppose to do then he’s going to start his sophomore year at the local CATHOLIC high school.

I told him that I was WAY more then prepared to send him for Freshman year but it was too late to register.. but that it was all set.. ready.. go for Sophomore year.

The look on his face was priceless. “.. I’m not going THERE!!”

Chief jumped in and said, “… you have no say in it. But if you don’t want to go there, then you know what you need to do to stay at [the public schooi]”

I was having a ball at his expense. I was saying stuff like, “.. yep, hair about your collar, shirt always tucked in, tie everyday…”

He thought he was finding an out by saying, “.. well, I’ll just throw myself in front of the trolley and be in a body cast so I can’t go.”

I started laughing and was like, “.. nope. You know what they do for cases like that? They have the nerdiest seniors who are trying to build their resume for their college applications come and sit in your room WITH you to tutor you. There’s no such thing as feeling in Catholic school!”

I swear the kid was starting to turn red and sweat. It just so happens that there was a customer in the school who was agreeing with me on every point.

Now, I just have to say this. There is really nothing “set up” for sophomore year. We did start considering taking him out of public school too late to enroll him in Catholic school and beside that.. the tuition would have REALLY been a stretch.

BUT .. he doesn’t know that. And considering he thinks we spent a HELLA lot more for Sylvan then we did .. AND considering how he knows my feelings on education… he wouldn’t put it past me… and that’s a good thing.

So we’ll see.

There’s only a week left of school and I BELIEVE that sometime this week is the 8th grade graduation ceremony. It’s not some big shindig like some school have.. his teacher’s have said it’s more like a transitioning thing.

Bubba hasn’t brought anything home about it.. but that doesn’t mean he didn’t receive anything.. unless he gave it to the crack whore… have no idea.

So I just emailed his teacher. We’ll see what she says!