Archive for the ‘Chief’ Category

I know … I know… I made a promise but my intentions, and the road to hell their paved on, are good!

I want to introduce you to the new man in my life:

This little man is Chief’s grandson, born 6/15 and weighing 5lbs. 8 oz and 17.5 inches long.

He was born 5 weeks premature… addicted to heroin… but for as bad as it could have been, he’s doing just fine.

Oh.. and did I happen to mention that both parents are currently in jail and have been since May 24th?

I started another blog dedicated specifically to him and the journey we’re on with him now. If we roll like that, shoot me an email and I’ll send you the link. I’m not going too public with it because their’s an infant and a whole lot of legal mess involved.

So just cruised by to share … !!

Here’s a few more:

Oh.. and PS my texaskid bestie, I can’t post from my iPad because the chicken pecking takes forever and I usually end up accidentally deleting the post!! Call me old school!! Love you!

 

… no, I didn’t die.

And my apologies to the family of Mr. Gerald Leese but come one, I couldn’t resist!

AND it’s 3:20am

Really, what the hell did y’all expect!

Anyway…

So I’m not going to give any excuses as to why I haven’t posted since January.

Blame it on work and the crazy hours of overtime I’ve been pushing… blame it on the home life.. blame it on moving… blame it on American Idol … none of that’s acceptable and for that I do apologize.

Oh.. but you CAN blame it on the iPad2. That thing is literally like crack and you’d be hard pressed to find it NOT in my hands from the minute I come home from work until the minute I fall asleep with it on my bed watching reruns of something on Hulu.

But once again I am promising to post more.. and one again you will roll your eyes and say “whateva” in your best Philly accent.

I get it.

BUT.. there are some interesting things on the horizon and who the hell else would I vent to? .. or AT.. as the case maybe!! LoL

Okay.. so let me catch you up with the Den of Dysfunction.

Briefly.

Or else this post is going to be a million words long… but really it’s because it’s almost daylight and I still have a pool to paint AND drive to another state to pick up my cell phone that I left behind in one of those go-visit-cousins-new-apartment-that’s-OMG-in-the-ghetto-so-lets-take-off-just-as-fast!

On to it:

CHIEF: Still not working… still hasn’t done a damn thing about his health insurance OR getting his driver’s license back BUT he has succumbed to being my house bitch so dinner is on the table when I get home.. laundry is done :: but not folded, so let’s say he’s a house bitch in training :: .. and he completely re-landscaped our whole property.. put in a garden.. built a front porch.. etc. etc. etc. So I have no complaints really. I don’t classify him as a bum because.. well, I already had one of those and I know the difference.

SPAZ: Must say that Spaz is less.. well.. SPAZZY. The little gnome has shot up and at last check he was as tall as me. His attitude has calmed down since he isn’t around his brothers or crack whore mother and he’s doing better in school. Not ALOT better but I’ll take what I can get. He cleans his room without being told… doesn’t get all bitchy when he has to help his father with yard work.. so he’s really made a turn around after the move.

BUBBA: Heh. Bubba. Did I tell y’all that he left our home a year ago because we were forcing him… FORCING HIM.. to go to school and that he went to live with the Crack Whore who provided no supervision, guidance, consequences, etc. so now he spends his days/nights drinking and smoking pot? Oh.. but see.. it gets SO MUCH BETTER!

You see.. they were living with this dude and because she is who she is and does what she does and lives how she lives, the dude was kinda getting pissed that she wasn’t holding up her end of the “bargain” :: insert anything you want there. I’m sure it wouldn’t be too far off the mark :: so a week before Bubba’s 17th birthday, she kicked him out over something stupid :: because she is, after all, an idiot :: and then high tails it out and moves into one of the seediest, ghettoist, crime ridden and drug riddled towns in my county… where she was promptly given a sash, tiara and corner to work.

Kidding about the last part.

They didn’t give her a tiara and sash.

But I digress…

We didn’t find any of this out until a month later when she supposedly was in the hospital with either pneumonia or breast cancer… can’t tell you which because she’s claimed both so it’s probably neither…. when she sent a text saying how rotten a father Chief was because he didn’t know she had kicked his son out  a month earlier and he was now living with a friend and it was all MY fault.

Yes, dear friends, all that happened because of me.

Whateva

So Chief goes into father mode.. contacts his son.. brings him to the house.. buys him some clothes :: because, you know, when she kicked him out and ditch the dude she was living with she left all their stuff there :: makes arrangements for him to live with Sarge which of course, the kid doesn’t want to do because then he wouldn’t be able to drink and get high.

But he is going to school now.

So he says.

Whateva.

WEED: Oh.. this is actually going to be huge in the coming months because did you know that him and his skanky girlfriend are having a baby? Yes.. my friends. A baby. Born to a father (maybe) who finally landed a job but spends his paycheck on drugs and a mother who is the same.. and yet the father (maybe) gets pissed off at the mother for doing drugs but doesn’t stop himself.

I have to say I had to do a lot of soul searching on this one … and have some pretty thick calluses on my knees from being on them all night praying for guidance.

Will you PLEASE get your mind out of the gutter!!

Thank you.

That’s going to be a post on it’s own because a lot happened.. a lot didn’t happen.. and a lot will be happening and all of it is going to land right smack dab in my lap…

So I suggest you buckle up your seat belts.. it’s going to be a bumpy ride!

Ok.

Bathroom visit? Check. Coffee refill? Double Check? Ready for this? NOT in the least.

And of course.. anything in my life that’s W.T.F. involves Weed.

Weed is now 22. Don’t know how much I caught you up on his antics but let’s just say he hasn’t changed. At all.

Back in July he caused a ruckus in front of MY family that got him kicked out of the house for good. He HAD been kicked out but for some reason had thought it was okay to stumble into the house at 2am and sleep off whatever had him wrecked in the first place.

He would either stay at the Crack Whore’s or the Crack House (both are the same in my opinion) and then in September he got arrested for shoplifting a lipstick for his skank ho girlfriend.

Thank landed him in the pokey for a month because no one who had 200.00 bucks would put it up for his bail.

He got out in October and did come over to the new house for a “family” (cough cough) dinner.

I didn’t want him here.. didn’t want Bubba here either.. but I’m not going to be the one blamed for Chief not seeing his sons. So dinner there was.. and dinner they ate.. and back to the Crack Whore’s house they went. The whole thing lasted about 3 hours.

Thank GOD for small favors.

At any rate..

A week before Thanksgiving Chief gets a phone call from Weed who tells him that he and his skank ho girlfriend have a “problem”.

Heh.. we all know what that “problem” is, don’t we?

Come on!!

Guess!!

Turns out the the skank ho girlfriend was ALSO in jail the same time Weed was. She got locked up the same time he did for the whole lipstick thing. OBVIOUSLY no one bailed her out either so OBVIOUSLY she’s not a good girl dabbling on the dark side. Turns out SHE is just as bad as HE is when it comes to popping pills, sticking needles in her arm and spending time in the pokey.

And now these two junkie low lives are breeding.

Nice.

Real Nice.

NOT being the biological parent.. and with my feet firmly planted in reality.. I IMMEDIATELY start thinking about the phone calls about the baby needing diapers.. needing formula.. needing a ride to the doctors.. etc. etc. etc. .. and I started getting pissed.

Chief.. who rides unicorns in clouds of cotton candy and farts glitter.. wasn’t down with the situation but a piece of him, I think, was a little gaga over the fact that there was going to be a baby around.

I say that because HE wasn’t understanding MY concerns. And they are concerns because even though I believe every baby is a blessing regardless of it’s misfortune of being conceived by junkies.. I know that I am the only one supporting this household right now. Chief hasn’t worked since forever and I’ve been working my ass off to not only get out of a financial hole but to get our lives back to normal.

And I am not about to backslide because the toxic twins decided to steal a lipstick instead of a condom.

Also, considering everything this kid put me through the last two years.. all the disrespect, name calling, theft of things I could never replace.. the anguish.. the attitude.. you name it.. you really think I’m all down for supporting something HE created?

I know that sounds mean.. I know that it isn’t the baby’s fault.. but I also know me and I also know how far back I’ve leaned .. how much I’ve let slide.. and as of RIGHT FRIGGIN’ NOW.. I’m bitter and resentful that Chief doesn’t have my back on this one.

End. Rant.

So fast forward to the beginning of December. Since no one is talking about anything that matters, I decide I’m going to stalk Facebook and see if I can find anything out.

We’re not “friends” .. but I am friends with someone he is friends with so I jump over to Weed’s wall. Nothing of interest. Oh, that’s right.. the Crack Whore didn’t pay the cable bill so the internet was cut. But then I see who he’s in a relationship with and let’s just say there’s a reason why I call her a skank ho.

This was early on a Thursday morning.. something like 3am. Her last post was something that I took as abortion guilt. Something about how murders deserve to be in jail and apologies for not allowing he/she to live long enough to decide whether it lived or died.

Listen, she’s a junkie. Do you really expect her to make sense?

When Chief gets up I tell him that I don’t think there’s a baby any more.

He… HE!!!.. tells me that the skank ho girlfriend od’d over the past weekend and that they took Weed in for questioning.

Um.

Wait.

EXCUSE ME?

You knew for FOUR days and you didn’t tell me WHY??

He said he found out from Spaz the previous Sunday when he picked him up from the Crack Whore’s and that he was soooo livid that he wanted to find Weed and beat the crap out of him.. and then he just wanted to put it out of his mind because he was so enflamed.

Good job on THAT one, Bucky.

I was beyond pissed. Not the first time that he hasn’t told me things that I think he should since we’re married and in a relationship and I support him and his kid’s simple asses.

But whatever.

At this point, I don’t know whether she’s dead or alive.. don’t know if Weeds’ in jail or not.. don’t know if she lost the baby because she od’d or od’d because she aborted the baby.

I let it go because they’re ALL pissing me off.

Fast forward two weeks and we have Chief’s twin brother Sarge and his wife over for dinner. I hear the three of them talking in the kitchen about Weed and I hear Chief say that Weed needs to live in a box for a while so he can get his shit together and be a productive member of society.

I stay firmly parked next to my fireplace. Let them talk. They’re all very good at talking ABOUT someone’s situation instead of talking TO someone about their situation. IF they talk at all, that is. Communication is NOT key with Chief or in his side of the family.

About an hour or so goes by and Sarge’s wife enters my personal space near the fireplace and asks me when the skank ho girlfriend is due. I tell her I didn’t think she still was and went into what I just went into above. She asked me what I was going to do about it.. and I looked at her like she ate too many candy canes off my Christmas tree.

I am doing NOTHING about it.. and went into the same thing I went into above.

She rambled something about getting stuff off Craigslist and if they want to be the knights in shining armor then more power to them. That’s how they roll.. come into a situation waving wads of cash.. offering this .. offering that.. all so they can say that THEY did something and Chief did not.

People: Now your significant other’s family before they become your significant other. Word.

So at this point.. two weeks before the Christmas dinner that his sons and the skank ho are attending, I have no clue whether or not there’s a baby.

I found out on Christmas.

When the Toxic Twins came over so freakin’ wrecked out of their minds.. and I’ve never felt so uncomfortable or so disrespected in my own home.

She’s running around the house .. jumping on my furniture.. saying how her baby is now exactly 11 weeks old and her name is whatever she said it’s name was going to be.

Weed couldn’t even verbalize:

ME: Where you working?
WEED: jdkagerj;f v irtdsf uaejrksdl  TRANSLATION: no.. but I’m trying
ME: So… you’re not working?
WEED: yifk gtreja gh;yi rfck vjitm vj TRANSLATION: i’m putting applications in
ME: So.. your not working.. have no money.. no place to live.. a baby on the way.. so how exactly were you able to get wrecked?

OR THIS CONVERSATION

WEED: sfgktkdf jto ih twy jtrfsd gab jdfkl hyt  TRANSLATION: when is your landlord going to clean out that spare room?
ME: None of your business because you’re not moving in here. Need me to say it slower?

OR THIS ONE AFTER HE SCRAPPED HIS PLATE IN TO THE DOGS’ WATER BOWL

WEED: siugjarf agt adiotrjfdkalfj adty   TRANSLATION: haha.. i’m as blind as  a bat
ME: No, you’re as high as a fucking kite.

Now, let me just add here that sometimes I have to be careful about my feelings. I don’t like these two so they could save a bag of puppies from drowning and I’d find fault with it. But since my  mother and Chief’s father were both a witness to this.. and saw the same things I saw and felt the same way I felt, I was justified in telling Chief after everyone was at their own houses that I did not want them back in my house anymore. Wasn’t happening. Wasn’t going to be disrespected or feel uncomfortable in the house that I’M paying for.

He got me. And to his credit, he had the good sense to be just as upset and pissed off as I was. For the moment anyway. Chief lets things go. I don’t. I’m Italian.

And then the straw that broke my camel’s back happened Wednesday.

Again, via Facebook, I found out that the Toxic Twins are planning to get married.

WEED: udf gafjdkgh rito afdjkg ja    TRANSLATION: it’s the honorable thing to do
SKANK HO:  fafidg  grh jthr gankdl khji tuera hd     TRANLSATION: i love my boos.

Chief had surprised me by coming up to work with lunch that day. As I sat in the car I asked him if he is ever in communication with his son OR his ex regarding the baby. He makes a face.. shakes his head and says ‘nope’.

So again.. I tell him what I saw on Facebook and he non-chalantly says “oh, yea.. Weed told me he proposed on Christmas day and I just blew it off”.

Nice. REAL Nice.

Once again.. I felt like I was kept out of the loop. Once again, I felt like we’re supposedly in a relationship where we’re suppose to be best friends and we’re suppose to support each other.. be shoulder to shoulder .. right?

OBVIOUSLY, I’m the only one who thought that.

Because APPARENTLY it’s a relationship where what’s mine is his and that’s just about fucking it.

So now here’s the thing.

If there’s one thing I know for sure is that I know how I am. It takes me a loooong time to turn my back but once it’s turned it stays that way. Once may feelings change.. they’re changed. Once I change my opinion of someone.. it’s changed.

And all the above happened.

So now I patiently wait until midnight where we tell each other our new year’s resolutions.. and I tell him that I don’t want to know about anything about anyone that doesn’t live under my roof.. don’t ask me for anything.. don’t tell me about anything.. don’t feed them food that I bought.. don’t invite them into a home that I pay for.. I don’t want to know or be a part of baby showers or wedding receptions or baptisms or births.

Done.. Over.. I’m Out..

 

… I know, I know!! It’s been far too long since I had the opportunity to just sit and blog. I should just MAKE the time but it’s the same old.. same old.. life happens, yknow?

Anyway..

I promise I will commit.. at least right NOW I promise to commit. You have to agree I need a reality show so just go easy on me!! LoL!!

Now.. back to it.

In the time honored tradition of ME101 .. let’s recap 2011

I may need a valium for this!

Okay.. the good stuff first:

After living without electricity for close to five months, we were finally able to move into The House Of My Almost Dreams. I say “almost” because we’re renting.. if I was paying a mortgage instead of rent well then.. you get the idea! But believe me, we were truly blessed to find this house. It was everything I was looking for LAST year when we thought we were moving to West Virginia.

But I think I told you all this already.

On-set Alzheimer’s. Throw me a bone, here.

Spaz started a new school and he actually has a friend. A NORMAL friend… well, as normal as anyone who would want to hang around Spaz can be. They’re kind of like the two misfits in the lunch room who sit with eachother because there is no one else to sit with. Believe me, I’m not being sarcastic. But his friend is a nice boy. Respectful and friendly. Lives close by and they even joined a school club together. Who am I to complain? It’s a step up. Believe me.

Spaz has also become a little LESS spazzy since we moved.. not ready for another nickname yet but he’s a lot better then he was so kudos to him. Being around his brothers is a WHOLE other story.. but we’ve addressed it. Told him that his attitude doesn’t get a free pass anymore because he doesn’t realize he has an attitude after spending time with them and that will be the end of it.

Did it sink in? Time will tell.

I did go back to work in May. Loving the job.. loving an actual paycheck now.. the company was sold to another company in October but so far there isnt anything to worry about. For now. But when God closes one door another opens so I’m just riding the “see what happens” wave.

My aunt bought another car and gave me her old one. It’s about 10 years old but still in great condition. The reduced rent made carrying another car on my insurance possible so now we’re actually using less gas because Chief doesn’t have to drive me to work and then pick me up. Bonus.

There may not be very many GOODS this year.. but what was GOOD is VERY VERY GOOD so I’m extremely blessed.

Now for the BAD..

When we moved out of our old house, the old landlord became very shady about giving us back out 2700.00 security deposit. Even though he gives slumlords a good name, he was fair to us when we needed him to be (think paying rent on time) and so we offered every opportunity to be fair to him. The security was suppose to be held in escrow but everybody and their mother with distant relatives knew that he didn’t have it available when he was suppose to. And if he would have just called us and told us that, we would have been cool but he decided to ignore phone calls, set up appointments for the final walk through that he didn’t keep, ignored more phone calls and then tried to pull a pile of crap out of his ass so we had to file a civil suit against him.

According to Pennsylvania’s Landlord / Tenant Act, if he didn’t return the security OR a list of deductions with the balance of the security within 30 days then he has to give us everything back. If we sued him for the original amount, he can’t counter sue us. If we sued him for double the amount (which we could) then he could counter for up to the original amount only. Either way, we walk out with the security.

We’re not greedy. We’re only suing for the original amount.

After he was notified, he sent us a certified letter outlining all the thing that we were responsible for (excuse me while I choke on complete fabrication) along with wanting to get paid for November’s rent. We were out of the house by November 1st. He’s clawing at straws. Either he really does think he has a case OR he never dealt with tenants who are actually literate and know how to read laws.

Either way, watch what happens.

The worst thing that happened this year.. actually the two worse things.. happened fairly recently and destroyed my heard.

Al .. one of our cats .. decided she wanted to be a complete outdoor cat when we moved. At the old house, she was outside 90% of the time but once we moved she decided there were far too many interesting things at the new place to waste time indoors. She stayed on the property.. had her condo on the front porch.. always had fresh food and water.. and was a happy camper.

The Saturday before Christmas Eve, Chief and I had returned in the late morning from shopping. As we turned in the driveway, Chief saw Al curled up at the bottom of the driveway.. dead. He rushed me into the house before I completely burst into tears and buried her under the japanese maple tree on our front lawn.

She wasn’t hit by a car.. and he had seen her early in the morning doing her morning yoga stretches on the front porch and she was fine. Beyond being upset, we were completely puzzled until the guy who exterminates my office building said it sounded like she had gotten into antifreeze.

Made sense.

The weather had gotten colder and I’m sure there were people in the neighborhood that put antifreeze in their cars and maybe spilled some.. hell, I could have spilled some. I don’t know.. but I sincerely doubt it was intentional. It’s just one of those horrible, hurtful things. The exterminator said that animals can’t resist antifreeze because it smells so sweet and that it can kill them in as little as 2 hours.

So let that be a lesson..

Al had had a litter of 6 kittens back in May. We kept one that we just started calling “Retard”. It’s a long story and if you’re offended then .. what can I tell you. My sandbox. But the name fit her and she was the most loving, friendly, comical, prettiest kitten you ever wanted to see.

The picture doesn’t do her justice.

She was more like a puppy, actually.. especially when I would come home from work and she would run to the door with the dogs to greet me.

About a month after we moved into the new house, she got out.

She used to follow Chief outside when he would be out there chopping wood or doing whatever.. but this time she went out the bedroom window and never came back.

We did everything that owners of lost kittens are suppose to do but nothing. Honestly, she is probably living large in someone’s house. She had no fear of people and if she wandered into someone’s yard, she would have went right to them.

that’s what I’m telling myself so don’t burst my bubble. I know everything I did wrong so you don’t have to bring that up either and it’s breaking my heart just typing this so I’m going to leave it alone.

So now we’re down to three dogs.. 1 cat.. and I pity the husband that tries to bring another animal into this house!! LoL

Now for the W.T.F!!

Believe me.. it deserves it’s own post so I’m going to run to the bathroom.. get a cup of coffee.. and set to typing!

Heh..

Every morning at exactly 7am, Chief starts our lawn mower. He places it in the middle of the yard and duct tapes the bar thingy that keeps the mower running so that the motor keeps running.

He also removed the something or other that keeps it quiet so now, it’s anything BUT quiet.

He comes in … stays awhile… goes out .. mows a little.. comes in.. stays awhile.. goes out.. mows a little.

The first day he did this, the Chief of Police kept circling our house.

Apparently, our so-called neighbors still thought we had a generator.

There’s absolutely, positively NO love lost between my Chief and the Chief of Police and I wish I had had a camera to see his face when he realized it was a lawn mower.

Especially since every single thing I was able to find regarding the borough does not mention lawn mowers .. or any landscaping tool for that matter.

After a few days of this … and almost measuring our grass blade by blade to make sure we were WELL within regulation.. and mowing some more to ensure we were complaint .. Chief decided to move on to OTHER parts of the yard that needed cleaning up.

Can you say CHAIN SAW?

Dang.. those branches hanging over are dangerous. Why, the Code Enforcer Guy could poke an eye out the next time he trespassed on our back lawn.. they were hanging so low.

And since we just may have had plans on Mother’s Day he needed to get started early.

So again, at 7am this morning, he went out and just as he was about to start the chainsaw, the so-called “neighbors” two houses down walk out of their house..

He looks at them.. and in his best horror movie voice says:

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY.. HEH.. HEH.. HEH..

And rips the chainsaw chord.

I don’t know about you, but this imagine IMMEDIATELY came to mind:

Funny to, a little while later when he was yet again mowing the lawn, the Chief of Police drove down our street.. slowed down.. and pointed to the blade clippings in the street.

MY Chief gave him the finger .. because there’s no law against grass clippings in the street AND they pay a street sweeper God knows how much money to drive the obscenely expensive street sweeper machine down my block twice a week.

There’s no doubt that we’re being harrassed.. there’s no doubt that we are being made to feel like criminals for doing absolutely nothing against any violation or code.

In fact, a while ago the CEG was on our ass about a pile of wood that was neatly stacked in the way back corner of our yard. A thunderstorm had downed a tree and we had it cut down and stacked. It was there for about a year when the CEG started getting ornery about it.

Just so happens.. today.. we passed by a house a few blocks from us that has a huge pile of a former tree along side their fence .. on the outside of their property. You can tell it’s been there awhile (I just never noticed it) but it got us wondering… have THEY been harassed about removing it?

My guess is no.

But honestly, it’s tiring.

I have a job interview on Monday and if I get it .. we’ve decided to move. This job will be closer to Chief’s new job and we wouldn’t have to deal with the hypocrasy that is this borough.

And believe me.. as soon as I’m out of there, I’m naming names and giving details!