2011 Intentions

I don’t do “resolutions” but when I read somewhere about someone making “intentions” because it’s less pressure I was like THAT’S IT!!

NOTE: Apologies to who ever I stole that from.. it may have been from a blog or on Facebook.. maybe even Bethenny Frankle’s twitter.. not sure so sorry for forgetting!

Anyway..

So I know with the New Year, it’s a good time to reflect, take stock and make the changes in your life that will make you a better, healthier person so I thought that I’d share mine with you.

IN 2011, LEESE INTENTS TO:

• Invent a gadget that prevents the bathroom door from opening unless the toilet is flushed. Being the only person in the house without a dangling thing makes this necessary!
• Not eat the whole bag of Stacy’s Parmaesan and Garlic Pita Chips. Frankly, it doesn’t take long to kill a bag and while they are way more then delicious, what they do to the back end on the way out isn’t pretty. Nothing is worth feeling that bad over.
• Be more conscience on how I act, what I say or things that I do representing my faith. This is a serious one, I know, but as I get older and face the things I have to face, I realize how important Christ is and more importantly, where I would be without Him. Rather, where I wouldn’t be.
• Not curse so much. It isn’t lady-like!
• Not make fun of Chief and his obsession with reading the Drudge Report and watching REAL! LIVE! UFO VIDEOS! on You Tube.
• Not roll my eyes when Chief tells me of yet another state where millions of dead birds fell from the sky. Really… no! seriously!
• Keep the back seat of my car clean. It doesn’t bode well when I try to get the kids to clean their rooms and they tell me that my car looks like a homeless person lives in it.
• Not forget to feed the fish. Those poor fish.
• Cuddle more with Bella. The old girl is getting up in years and with all the attention that Ernie, The Terrorist Puppy and the cats get, I really don’t want her to feel left out. Although she’s probably more then happy to just eat, sleep and poop without the having to pretend she’s excited that I’m sitting on the floor next to her keeping her from sleeping.
• Not quote lines from the Real Housewive’s franchise.
• Stop justifying polygamy to Chief. Not that I would ever want to practice it, mind you.. but really, how awesome would it be to have a sister wife to do the laundry.. another to do the cleaning.. another to do the ironing.. another to clean the *gag* bathroom.. you get the idea!! LOL
• Learn more about Dr. Who then Chief does.. and he knows A LOT!!!
• Continuing writing all my blogs.. and play less Zuma Blast on Facebook. Ok. No.. I don’t think I can do that!

So that’s what I came up with so far. As me in a month and I’ll let you know how it’s going!

But you know.. Stacy’s Parmesan and Garlic Pita Chips sound awwwwffuuullly good right now!!

New Blog Alert!

Oh.. you’re going to love this one!!

If there’s one thing I ALWAYS have, it’s an opinon.. since y’know.. I have so many myself!

And if there’s one thing I ALWAYS do, is check out the blogs of people who are nice enough to drive by here and leave one of their own.

I mean, not only is that the proper etiquette .. but it’s also a great way to find great blogs. This is a GREAT one:

Click on the banner to jump on over...

The Art Major that still swims around in me LOVE that banner, too..

So if you’re like me and love pop culture, definitely check out BabyGirl’s blog .. you won’t be sorry!

My Man’s Meat..

Smoked Pork .. Nummy Nums!!

Oh.. get you’re mind out of the gutter!!!

Those pictures are on my other blog!! LoL!! Just joking!

I was cleaning out my camera and found these pictures of pork butts that Chief was smoking.

We had a catering order back in November for a country line dance night at the local fire hall.

When we catered it last year, they wanted the standard stuff :: roast beef, meat balls, stuffed shells :: which were all good but when they came in this year, he talked them into a menu that was kind of related to country music more then stuffed shells were.

So he came up with Carolina Pulled Pork, Chili Braised Beef Brisket, Black Bean and Corn salad, Smokey Baked Beans, Spanish Rice and Home Made Corn Bread.

Oh. And salad.

Not having a real smoker didn’t stop him. He used our charcoal grill and some of the huckleberry wood from our tree out back.

NOTE: You can use any fruit tree to smoke but DO. NOT. USE. PINE. WOOD. like I had suggested because DUH! Where do you think Pine Sol comes from?? LoL!! THIS is why HE is the chef and I’m not!!

He let it smoke for something like a day.. going out every hour or so to flip them over and to baste them with a mixture of  cider vinegar, crushed red pepper, salt and water.

Oh.. before he even started to smoke it, he rubbed the meat down with brown sugar, cayenne pepper, salt and chili powder.. wrapped it up tight in plastic wrap and let it sit in the fridge for two days.

Let me tell you something, the aroma was AMAZING and everyone in our neighborhood was salavating!

Too bad it was for a catering gig, huh?

No worries, he had made another one for us!!

But seriously, it was really.. really easy to do and the meat just split right off of it with a fork.

I never had anything soooo good in my life!

So if you get the ambition to give it a try, let me know how you make out.

No.. in fact, invite me over for dinner and I’ll let you know myself!!

I Was Waiting For This…

... actually the Crack Whore's brain is smaller then this

Text message received at 8:53am this morning:

Gm informing u theyll b court 2 keep my kids close u cant just move them 6 hrs away without ther mother

Yep.. that’s verbatim.

See what a lack of education plus drugs and alcohol do to your brain?

We’ll just ignore the word “mother” here

Anyway.. so yea.. the Crack Whore is threatening to take Chief to court because we’re moving.

Truthfully, even though he has full, legal custody and she doesn’t even have formal visitation rights, I don’t know what she can or can’t do legally. He doesn’t either but instead of finding out, he’s doing something other then being concerned.

But let’s look at the facts:

• She left the family when Bubba was around 4 and Spaz was an infant.
• She has documented issues with drugs and alcohol
• She has a felony record
• She has been in a psychiatric ward
• She hasn’t regularly paid child support and is now currently 6 or 7 months behind.
• She never filed for visitation even after signing over all rights to her kids

There were times when she went months without seeing or talking to the kids.

So is it that she wants custody? Or is it that she just wants to stop US from moving? Because this woman :: I use the term loosely :: doesn’t know what it’s like to parent kids 24/7 .. she has them when she wants them and never both at the same time because she can’t “deal” with their fighting. She has no clue how they act because they aren’t with her long enough for her to find out.

I can’t tell you how many times she’s complained about them.. couldn’t deal with them and sent them back..

Now.. all that may not make a difference. And it probably won’t. But the thing also is that the kids in question are 16 and 12 and old enough to make their own decision on who they want to live with.

And if they want to live with her? Fine.. there is no revolving door. If you’re going to make that choice then you better REALLY think it out because once it’s done.. it’s done. There is no “come pick me up” or “come get him” .. not going to happen. Come for summer vacation.. come for Christmas vacation… no problem.

This morning I was told that Spaz asked if he was allowed to spend the last week of January with the Crack Whore. Spaz, you remember, it the son that the Crack Whore said wasn’t biologically Chief’s. The last week of January is when we were set to make the move to West Virginia.

I said to Chief that he needs to keep in the back of his head that she might run with him. Chief said that he didn’t think she would but I told him that I like to think of everything prior to it happening just in case. He said he wouldn’t stop Spaz from living with her if he really wanted to.

Great.

So I told him that if Spaz said he didn’t want to move.. and wanted to live with her then he needed to sit that kid down and explain to him in words that he could understand that once it’s done.. it’s done.. and that he can’t just call up and want to live with us the first time that she disappoints him or if things turn out not to be the way she promises it will be. Because it never is.

I also told Chief that I’m sorry if that sounds harsh but I’ve had to put up with her and her regarding the kids since she moved back into our town and this is my life too and I have every right to voice my opinion regardless of how it sounds because I’m entitled to it.

He said he understood and he appreciated me being honest.

So we’ll see where this goes ..

 

Thoughts On Cyber School: NOT For Every Parent

I’ve always been under the thought that not all people learn the same way. That point was proven when I worked and one of my responsibilities was training employees on new computer systems or contracts or whatever it is I had to train.

Not to pat myself on the back, but I AM a good teacher.

Sorry.. just had to throw that in there.

But you know, some people are visual learners.. some are lazy learners.. some are better at comprehending direction literally, etc.

Same with kids.

Bubba’s issues with school have been VERY well documented on here. In a nutshell, he trashed 7th grade .. we sent him to Sylvan Learning Center.. he trashed 8th grade.. he was socially passed to high school .. he trashed 9th grade and then his school advisers bumped him down to Special Ed classes for 10th grade.

He doesn’t need Special Education.. unless laziness and lack of motivation require Special Education. Because what his problem is and truthfully, up until I came into their lives, their father had the same lack of motivation in motivating them. Maybe he didn’t know how.. maybe he wasn’t around enough.. but whatever the excuse :: because he’s not getting a free pass from me on this :: Bubba figured out a long time ago how to do what little work as possible and then smooze whatever teacher he had at the end of the year.

Not to mention that we live in probably one of the worst school districts in the state.

Not to mention that Bubba was placed on an IEP (Individual Education Program) that to me, gave student and teachers a like the ability to write everything off as a learning disability. I am STRONGLY against IEP’s and if you research the No Child Left Behind nonsense, what really was done was lower the bar so it APPEARED that students were doing better then actually working hard to ensure that kids are educated.

Just my opinion.. save your time on the hate mail.

At any rate, Bubba  is a smart kid. You can’t be that good at beating the system without being smart. He just didn’t like school and one of the things that we learned from his time at Sylvan is that he is a visual learner. Even though he has a ridiculously high reading ability, he learns better when shown how to do it versus reading how to do it. He aslo performed better when in a smaller class environment.

That’s all fine well and good except that the only place meeting those requirements was Special Ed classes.

At first, the thought of being in a small classroom doing 4th or 5th grade work appealed to Bubba.. but after about 2 months the novelty wore off and one night, I happened to see a report that he had written on the computer regarding his education and how he realized that purposefully trashing his education up until that point had screwed him up and how he felt horrible that we had spent so much money on sending him to Sylvan and he hadn’t taken advantage of it.

It was a pretty mature assessment and I remember thinking to myself.. yea, this kid is FINALLY getting it!!

ALL the kids can tell you how much I harp on education.. how valuable it is.. how it sets the stage for the rest of your life.. how much I loved school and how wanting to learn is something that will serve you well in all areas of your life.

Yep.. call me the Education Czar.

When we started getting phone calls from his teachers recommending him for Cyber School, I thought that maybe he was at a maturity level to handle the responsibility. Because it IS a responsibility. I met with the teacher in charge of alternate education at his high school and we ran through a demo of the program.. I asked every question I could think of.. and was assured that not only does the system total the time actually spend WORKING (not just from logging in) but offers a variety of different reports that the parent can access so that you can actually SEE what your kid is doing.. or not doing for that matter.

My personal opinion was that Bubba, not having to go to a brick and mortar school and sitting all day in front of a computer in his pajamas, would be more interested in learning and that he could actually get enough credits to graduate a lot sooner then if he went to school.

The fact that both of us were going to be home to monitor him was actually the deciding factor BUT we told Bubba that he still needed structure. He was still going to have a bedtime.. was still going to get up early and still spend an X amount of hours on school work.

He readily agreed and for the first week, he did.

But like everything else, he started to slack and his father started to slack.

I was pulling the reports daily.. showing his father who would just make comments about telling Bubba this or making Bubba do that which never materialized.. showing Bubba who half paid attention and then still did what he wanted to do because when I forced his father to get involved.. he would yell at him and then go back to doing what he was doing leaving Bubba to just go back to doing what HE was doing.. which wasn’t school work.

It’s all very frustrating for me because I can only do so much…

So when the move to West Virginia was put on the table, I took the opportunity over family dinner to lay it out for Bubba.

West Virginia does have a cyber school program.. Bubba had to the choice to commit to his work now so that the WV Board of Education would allow him to continue.. OR he goes back to regular high school. A county high school that’s way bigger then the one that he was in here. Plus, there would be no limo service. Chief and I will both have to get jobs so we won’t be available to drive him and pick him up.. he’d have to catch the school bus.

If that were to happen, he could forget about getting a job when he turned 16 to afford his own car and insurance. Going to a brick and mortar school means that he would be vying for the same shifts that every other student wanting to work would be trying for.

He said he wanted to stay in cyber school so that he could work. I told him that no one can make that happen but him and I was going to stop taking his education personally.. it was his decision and he needed to make it happen but one way or the other, he WAS going to get an education.

This conversation started at the beginning of traditional Christmas break.

Did he do anything? Nope. I kept bringing it up.. bringing it up.. bringing it up.. telling his father to do something.. and all Bubba did was sleep at the Crack Whore’s or spend the night with friends.

All very frustrating for me.

Today, everything came to a head.

Last night I told Chief that he had to wake Bubba up at 9am.. show him the reports.. show him what he wasn’t doing.. and sit next to him if he had to to make sure he did it.

That didn’t happen.

When I came home at 10:30, Bubba was still asleep. I tried waking him up but he ignored me. Chief tried to wake him up and he ignored him. When he finally DID get up, he bitched that it was “early” .. um, sorry son, 11am is NOT early.. but I sat him down at the computer and showed him the reports that WE were looking at and explained to him where he was lacking and what he needed to do.

I told him that he had to hit every subject, not just the ones he liked or he found easy. Part of this district’s program is that he has the opportunity to get instruction from a real teacher if there is something that he gets hung up on or doesn’t quite understand.

There really are no excuses.

After 47 MINUTES, he told me he did work on every subject.

So I grabbed his father.. pulled up the reports and told him that what he DID was complete ONE LESSON from every unit. Not good enough. He started getting flippy .. which made his father angry and started yelling .. and then Chief retreated back to the bedroom to play video games leaving Bubba to go back to playing his computer game.

All very frustrating for me and so I told Chief that the experiment was over. Tomorrow we were going back to the high school to get Bubba back in there on Monday. If he chooses not to come to WV because he doesn’t want to go to a regular high school there then he can stay here. Right or wrong, there’s very little I can do without any support from his father.

While I totally believe in the advantages of cyber school, I also believe that it takes a certain type of kid AND a certain type of parent. Obviously, not all parents are cut out for the additional responsibility of making sure their kid gets the education available to them and that’s a shame because the benefits far out way the down falls.