You know..
I really have no idea why some many people get pissed off by this phrase. They seem to think its some sort of a cop out.. or that you don’t want to put an effort into whatever circumstance is leading you to say it.
Dunno..
Me? I live by that saying because I have learned the very hard way that you cannot control destiny and you can’t stress over thing you can’t change.
Ok.. sometimes I do stress over things I can’t change.. but the important thing is I know that I shouldn’t.
I may not always talk like it.. but I have a strong faith in God.
Don’t know why that upsets some people so much .. but again, that’s one of the things I can’t change so I don’t worry about it.
So here’s the reason for this post..
About a month ago, Cheif and I were driving through another borough and we saw a FOR RENT sign on a really sweet house. It’s a twin, which we weren’t too thrilled with, but it had a front porch .. a two tier deck in the back.. sat in front of a a dense tree line and was across from the creek. Completely picturesque.
So we called the number and left a message. It was a Sunday so we really didn’t expect to reach anyone.
The following morning, my cell phone rings but I didn’t recognize the number so I didn’t answer it. Bad habit, I know.. but when you have a 12 year old who uses your phone number to sign up for services on the internet because he thinks he’s getting a free Playstation or XBox I think I’m a little bit justified.
But then something about the number looked familiar. So I called it back and told the man that answered that I received a call from this number but was not left a voice mail.
He said that the number showed up on HIS caller ID and then it clicked that it was about the house. He told me to call another number to speak to the guy who was showing the house. I did and we made a date to have a looksy.
The house was just as amazing inside as out .. I particularly fell in love with the loft that was in the master bedroom. It has central air.. a laundry room on the first floor and all other kinds of things. They wanted 1400.00 a month.. which is what we are paying now and what we’re looking to NOT pay anymore. BUT it is a better school district and the owners WERE looking for long term tenants. The guy showing us the house said that he may be able to get us the house for around 1300.00 if we were willing to commit to a 5 year lease.
Now, that’s a long time but considering that Spaz still has 5 or 6 years left in school, I was fine with it.
Then the hard part came.. the application.
When you own your own business, it’s kind of hard to prove your income. Especially since ours is a relatively new business and we told draw actual pay checks. Also, we don’t use credit. I explained that both our credits tanked after our divorces and he was fine with it. In speaking to him, we found out that he was also a Christian of deep faith and him and Chief talked and gave witness and all that while I was getting eaten up by mosquitoes.
We left and I felt surprisingly ok. Not anxious.. not impatient.. it’s going to be what it’s going to be.
The following day I received a call from their office and the woman I spoke to just wanted to go over a few things on our application. I told her that I would be able to fax her over our tax returns for income verification and that regardless of whether it was a yes or a no, I needed to know by the end of the month at the earliest or beginning of the month at the latest because I would need to give my current landlord 30 days notice.
She said that, for her, it was a go.. she just had to let the owner give his ok.
We got excited but when I emailed her the tax forms, I asked her to email me back saying that we had the house so that there were no misunderstandings.
I didn’t hear back from that day and the nothing the next day and I started to panic. This was around the time that Weed got arrested and I was trying to figure out where we were going to get an additional 1400.00 for the security deposit.. and I didn’t want to start off things in a bad way with the new landlord.
So driving home from my mom’s the second night we hadn’t heard anything about the house, I had such pressure on my chest about the whole money situation that I told Chief that I was going to back out. He lives by the credo that God will provide for him.. I believe that also, but I happen to think that God wants you to be a little proactive and A LOT responsible.
So I emailed the woman the next day and told her that there was a recent personal situation that occured the day before that may or may not impact our financial status and that I didn’t think it was responsible to sign a new lease just in case our finances were impacted.
I then emailed the guy and explained further about the problems with Weed.. that he had been arrested again and that this time, we may have to have to take him in. Doing that would mean that the new house would be too small and that we would be spending more for utilities and food, etc.
I may have used Weed as an excuse but I wanted to cover our bases and not look like screw up. To me, I think it came across as two people who were fiscally responsible.
I never heard from the woman, but did hear from the guy. He wrote me and told me that he had a friend who specialized in kids like Weed and perhaps we could get him involved in this program.
And that was that. Nothing more on the house.
Fast foward to about two weeks ago and out of the blue, the guy called Chief at the store and asked him why we had backed out. Chief was honest with him about Weed. Funny, because I never told Chief that I had emailed the guy and explained that his son was a junkie fuck up. But yknow.. the truth is always the best road to travel.
The guy said that they were having trouble finding renters for the house for one reason or another and the owner kept referring back to us and why we didn’t want it. He then asked Chief if he would be willing to rent the house for 1250.oo a month.
OMG!! Are you KIDDING me??
So Chief.. all nonchalant.. said yea. Of course. So the guy said he would talk to the owner again and to have faith.
Didn’t hear anything else about it and every once in a while the thought would cross my mind but again .. it is what it is.
Today, Chief let me sleep late so I didn’t get to the store until 11. When I walked in there was a guy standing there talking to Chief. He said HI LEESE! HOW ARE YOU! .. and honestly, I didn’t know who the hell he was. So I said FINE and went about my business and then it hit.
It’s the GUY.. the one who showed us the house.
He said he stopped by because he lost our number.. and that the house still isn’t rented. The owner, apparently, is a little unsure about whether to rent it to us because he can’t pull a credit history on us. So I think he stopped by to make sure what we said was on the up and up.
I told him that we weren’t actively looking at other houses and when / if the owner makes up his mind he’ll know where to find us. So it still looks like the house is on the table but again, I refuse to get my hopes up about it or make plans about it or not about it or whatever because I can’t make this guy change his mind. I can’t make him take a leap of faith and I can’t move in to a house until it’s meant for me to move in it.
Thinking that way is really a huge burden off one’s shoulders..
So who knows.. we might be moving out of chatteau ghetto soon!!
This is HUGE!!
LIVING ME 101 