REVIEW: Despicable Me

First of all, let me tell you that I am NOT into kids movies.

Can’t stand cartoons.. animation.. clay-mation.. none of that stuff. Given the choice, I’d rather watch a good thriller, drama or even a chick flick when I’m in the mood.

Yesterday, I didn’t have a choice.

We had taken Spaz out for his birthday and we couldn’t do what we were going to do so we asked him if there was anything he wanted to do and he said go to the movies.

We avoid taking the kids to the movies because it’s insanely expensive. Especially since you would think that these kids have never seen popcorn before let alone eat it.

But we didn’t want him to be more disappointed then he already was so we drove to the theater HOPING AGAINST HOPE that everything had already started.

No such luck and the only thing that was playing that was appropriate for his age :: yes, we’re parents that pay attention to the ratings :: was Despicable Me.

Thrills.

I was actually pissed at my self for buying that large cup of Dunkin’ Donuts coffee earlier because had I not, I would have been ripe for a nap.

Anyway.. I’m glad I didn’t. I absolutely LOVED this movie and was probably  laughing harder and louder then the kids in there.

Gru is a bad guy who is trying to get a loan so he can build a rocket and steal the moon. Vector is another bad guy but he’s a lot younger and sticks it to Gru every chance he gets. Gru steals something that Vector steals from him and Gru’s attempt to get it back are being constantly squashed by Vector until the three little orphan girls show up at his house. Gru adopts them so that he can get into Vector’s house and steal what he needs to steal.

That’s the premise of the movie and you  know that with three squealing girls running around, all kids of stuff is going happen that makes Gru pull his hair out.

There are a lot of “ahhhh” moments and even though I’m sure you all know how a movie like this ends, it the getting there that was the real treat.

Also.. the little yellow guys? OMG!!! You would have thought that there was something in my SweetTarts besides sugar they way I was laughing at their antics!

Definitely worth the 54 bucks we spent.

Well.. ok.. 54 dollar is a lot of money for three people to go to the movies but .. yknow.. if I had to spend that much, at least I really enjoyed the movie!

But not the popcorn.. freakin’ Chief had them put that fake plastic butter on it and that stuff KILLS my system!!

REVIEW: Grown Ups

Considering who’s in this movie, you have to know that it’s going to be funny. That goes without saying.

I originally didn’t want to go see this movie because I figured it was going to be one of those stupid guy movies with jokes about boobs and butts that really, teenage films do much better.

But I was wrong.

This great cast of comedians play adult. Yes there are a lot of funny scenes and jokes that make the person sitting in front of you wish you didn’t have a mouth full of popcorn when you belly laughed but the movie in and of itself isn’t juvie.

These childhood friends come together after 30 years due to the death of their beloved basketball coach. All have had different degrees of success and failure of the years. Adam Sandler is now a Hollywood agent married to a fashion designer played by Selma Hayak :: who is definitely underrated as an actress ) .. Chris Rock is a house husband who has to deal with his wife’s constant insults and mother-in-laws jabs.. Kevin James has a wife who still breast feeds her 4 year old.. David Spade is the never married eternal frat boy and Rob Schneider is.. well.. Rob Schneider. He’s just freakin’ hilarious with his older then dirt wife and hotter then hell daughters. Well, two are.

Hilarity ensues.. as expected.. but there is one really tender moment that completely sums up the notion that success in life isn’t always about how much is in your bank account.. it’s how you live your life.

If you’ve seen it, leave a comment. I’d love to hear what you think!

RHWNJ Beat Down: Tonight’s The Night!

So how funny is it watching people with boujie money getting all ghetto?

Last year we had the infamous table turning incident with Theresa yelling WHOREPROSTITUTIONBITCH .. or something like that and tonight we finally get to see the epi where Jacqueline’s daughter Ashley pulls out a handful of Danielle’s extension.

Now, I’m all for watching a good train wreck. Anything that circumnavigates the drama under my roof gets a thumbs up from me.. but this show has gone beyond entertaining.

In Season 1, I’ll admit that I had a soft spot for Danielle, the resident wanna-be. The portrayed her :: the wonders of editing!! :: as someone who has always been on the outside looking in and really just wanted to run with the big dogs.. those being the Manzo sisters Caroline, Dina and sister in law Jacqueline.

So yea, she made some bad choices in her life and got caught up with the wrong people for probably the wrong reasons. But hey, we all got skeletons in our closet, right? Mine don’t include felony charges, kidnapping and stripping but hey, who am I to judge.

It wasn’t until the last scene in the last episode of the first season where, completely out of the character she had portrayed thus far, she whipped out a cigarette.. lit it.. did the ghetto pose and said something :: can’t remember :: that was more Camden then Franklin Lakes .. or where ever it is she lives.

It was then I thought, AHHHHHHHHH!!! True colors showing now, huh?

So I kinda figured that this season was going to be titled “The Season Of Revenge” but let me tell you.. the little universe that girlfriend is the center of needs a WHOLE LOTTA prozac.. or lithium..  or shock treatments.

Week after week was nothing but her delusions and paranoia. Hiring bubble gum gangsters with bad tattoos and even worse hair who probably wouldn’t be able to spell their names without Vanna White and some vowel buying.

It was sad.. and even sadder for the two little girls she birthed who actually, seem more in touch with reality then she is.

She engaged in all kinds of immature and child-ish behavior.. twitter wars with a teenager, for one.. that was like, Girl just give it a REST!

For her sake, I hope her role was just a case of editing because if THAT’s how she really IS? OMG..

So tonight we have the infamous hair extention pulling and we get to see if she can cash the checks her mouth wrote.

I’m not going to lie.. I can’t wait to see it. There’s something morbidly entertaining about watching the high and mighty face plant!