Archive for January 19, 2010

Ok.. that title’s lame. I admit it.

Ok?

OK?

Geez.. could you give it a rest now?

Anway … Unless you’ve been cemented into an Amish family’s barn foundation, I know you’ve heard of Lady GaGa.

You may have heard OF her.. but have you ever HEARD her? I mean.. like her songs?

If not.. allow me five minutes of your precious time and watch this video:

Bad Romance happens to be my favorite song obsession at the moment and like anything I get obsessed about, I need to find out as much as possible.

Not having a job helps when your up to 3am cruising the internet for info, I’ll tell you what!

So now here’s the thing..

Yes, this emo / alt rock / classic rock chick really digs her music. I normally wouldn’t be caught dead with ANYTHING ‘pop’ or ‘pop’ related but this is the exception to the rule.

Alright.. alright.. I read Perez Hilton, ok? But that’s just because I’m a gossip whore who she really doesn’t care about what happens in celebrity lives but buys People and US Weekly.

But I will tell you what I like the most about Lady Gaga. Beside her songs. She is the complete opposite of the impression that she originally makes. She is committed to her vision.. she is committed to her art.. she has the chops. Her voice and talent are not studio created.

And dare I say she is humble and authentic?

Big words to use for some one who has had 5 consecutive #1 hits of a debut album.

I downloaded The Fame Monster the other day and I have to say that I love every song. Another rarity. Each one is different in it’s own way. For instance, give me another three minutes of your time and check out this song:

This was the video that made me realize that there was a lot more to her.. so yea she’s hot.. and her videos are sexy.. and she’s Italian-American.. but don’t be so quick to write her off and if you get a chance to see her interviewed, don’t change the channel.. you won’t be disappointed and you might just change your mind.

Oh.. and by the way.. she has replaced Angelina Jolie as my Girl Crush!! LOL

I’m sure you all know Weed’s story but if you don’t.. or if your new here to my little insane world that keeps me sane, then here’s the down low:

Weed is my oldest stepson who decided that drinking and doing drugs was NOT the only thing life has to offer.. so he started dealing. And not only was he dealing from our house, he was also dealing out of our store. Along with the fact that one of his cronies robbed our house three times in a week ( the first week of December ’08) he was kicked out and has been living with the Crack Whore ever since.

The Crack Whore being his mother who drinks and drugs as much as he does.

Oh.. not to mention that he was arrested last year for breaking into neighborhood cars at 4am with no shoes on. The fact that he had no shoes on was disturbing enough. I mean, he literally walked out of our house and started trying door handles. But what was REALLY messed up was the things he stole.. a half roll of pennies, a shower cap, a candy bar, a car manual.

I mean.. REALLY!

So it’s been a LOOOOOONG year with him.. from trying to get him into rehab.. to trying to convince him to take rehab seriously.. but the straw that broke the proverbial camels back was when the things HE was doing caused Chief to get arrested last January.

Parents? Never name your son after their father if there is ANY CHANCE that he will grow up to be a drug dealing junkie with a vendetta for being thrown out of your house.

I honestly never thought that I would be able to look this kid in the eye again without dropping him on his ass. He still has no idea how much suffering he caused and how getting his father arrested almost cost us everything.. including custody of his brothers.

But that’s a junkie mind for you.. never look past anything that has to do with you and what you can get for what you need.

At any rate..

I, of course, have a different perspective on things because he isn’t my kid. And I had to give Chief a little bit of a lead because that’s his son and I don’t think any father could completely right off their kid. Well, maybe they can but I know Chief can’t.

I think a lot of his feeling had to do with not wanting to believe Weed was as far gone as he was… dunno. I wasn’t in his shoes but I did have to take a stance a while back and tell him that if he had any intentions of Weed moving back in that have him use the back door because I’d be moving my shit out the front door.

But time does make a difference and about two months ago, the Crack Whore contacted me in a panic because Weed needed to pay for his GED test before his next court date. Of course, the next court date was the following day and so to make sure he did what he was suppose to do, we put up the money.

He took the test and then he got another letter saying that if he didn’t pay his 1400.00 in fines, he was going to be removed from whatever program they had put him in for first time offenders and go to jail.

Of course, the Crack Whore was in a panic again.

And of course, it was me being the adult and stepping up to the plate.

I talked to Chief about what I was thinking and then talked to Weed.

Since he wasn’t able to get a decent job without his GED :: he has since been notified that he passed :: I told him that I would pay his fine BUT he had to work a few hours in the store for it. I wouldn’t give him the money.. I would send it directly to the courthouse. If he didn’t work, it didn’t get paid.

He readily agreed .. well, he really didn’t have a choice.. and I gave him a letter outlining the deal for him to present to the judge.

Everybody went along with it and I’m really surprised and excited to say that he’s been keeping up his end of the bargain. Without bitching or complaining or being a pain in the ass.

He comes in when he’s suppose to .. does things that need to be done without being asked.. and has taken a load off of both me and Chief.

He isn’t unsupervised .. not left in the store alone.. or has his friends in.. or is near the register without Chief being over his shoulder because let’s face it, neither of us really trust him .. but it seems to be working out and relationships are in the processes of being mended. Won’t say “fixed” because I don’t think they ever will.. but it’s gotten better so that’s a good thing.

Plus he’s been putting on a little weight and generally looking not as junkie-ish as he was:

April 08

December 09

Hmm.. he does look a little wasted in this picture, doesn’t he??

Anyway, I know he wasn’t because he was with us the whole day and there wasn’t really any opportunity or alcohol around to entice him.

He seems to be getting his life in order.. or at least straighter.. and for Chief’s sake, I couldn’t be happier.

This is another “keep your finger’s crossed” thing

Ok..

This is DEFINITELY a man thing. And for all you men out there who are reading this YOU KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!!!

So this has to do with the Christmas .. and what I got for Christmas..

Now, let just say this right now. I think I’m the EASIEST person to buy something for because I appreciate anything. It really doesn’t matter what the gift “IS” .. To me, it the thought that you went out and actually looked for something that you think I might like that makes me go all gaga over it.

NOTE: Ok .. don’t do the whole WHAT ABOUT IF THEY JUST RAN INTO TARGET AND GRABBED SOMETHING OFF THE SHELF WITHOUT ANY THOUGHT AT ALL thing. Let’s just stick to the story and how I’m so goddamn noble for appreciating anything!!

So Chief.. having dangling things between legs.. asks me :: rather PLEADS with me :: “… tell meeee whaaaaat I can geeeeeet yooooou!!!”

Ok.. so .. if I have to TELL you what you want, then it really doesn’t meet my “gift” criteria. So the answer is always the same “.. Nope, cuz it doesn’t matter”. And he usually does a good job because you know, DIAMONDS are always a good gift, right girls?

This year, Christmas was a bitch. My unemployment check fell on the 23rd which meant nothing but running around to all ends of the earth.. then bringing everything over to Birds :: because the little heathens would search hell and high water to see what they were getting :: and then wrapping everything then driving all over creation to deliver gifts to the people that I wasn’t going to actually SEE for the holiday :: ie: Mom, Brother, etc. :: .. It was so intense that I’m seriously thinking of becoming a Jehovah’s Witness next year. Don’t mean to be offensive but they don’t do gifts so.. yknow.. that’s alright with me!

The Monday or Tuesday before Christmas, me and Chief were walking home from the shop

ME: I’m like.. really REALLY stressing over Christmas shopping
CHIEF: YOU? I’m practically pissing my pants
ME: Why the hell would you be pissing your pants?
CHIEF: Duh! Were we not just talking about shopping?
ME: Hmph. Like you’re doing any shopping
CHIEF: I have to get you something, dumbass.. and I can’t drive, remember?
ME: Yea.. but you only have to worry about ME.. I have to worry about EVERYBODY else. I’d rather have your deal, Bucky.

So the following day we were in the shop with Weed when the conversation started again..

ME: Hey! Yknow what? You worried about what to get me? Get me a dryer. You don’t even need to drive.. just walk your ass across the street. There. Simple. Done. See how easy that was?

CHIEF: I can’t get you an APPLIANCE for Christmas..

ME: Who says?

CHIEF: It isn’t right..

ME: It’s right if that’s what I want..

CHIEF: I’ve made fun of guys who bought their wives appliances for Christmas

ME: You mean to tell me you wouldn’t think I would be tickled pink if I woke up Christmas morning with a chrome LG Front Loading dryer in the basement with a big ass bow on it?

CHIEF: I’m not getting you a dryer. That’s something that we have to go shopping for together

ME: Are you fucking KIDDING me? You’re saying buying a dryer is a “couple’s” thing?

CHIEF: Nope. Not doing it.

ME: BUT I WANT ONE

CHIEF: and you’ll get one. Just not for Christmas.

ME: But I hate going to the laundromat and I’m backed up on clothes because the kids aren’t in school and I thought you’d be SMART ENOUGH to REALIZE that a dryer is THE. PERFECT. GIFT.

CHIEF: (rolling eyes) I’m going to get you a dryer. AFTER the holidays

ME: I WANT A FUCKING DRYER FOR CHRISTMAS DAMMIT

WEED: I think I’d get her the dryer, Dad.

The next day, Christmas Eve, he was going out to get me my gift and kept getting hung up at the shop. I kept trying to push him out the door, “.. yknow, the longer you wait the crappier my gift gets”.

So he goes and me and Weed are working and he says something about how he thinks he knows what I’m getting. It better be a fucking dryer, I tell him. He gulps and says that he doesn’t think it is.

At this point, I ‘m thinking that I am getting a dryer and it’s this big conspiracy to make me think that I’m not. Chief’s an ass when it comes to doing stuff like that to me.

He’s gone for HOURS. I mean.. HOURS. I actually didn’t think I was going to see him again until after the new year because like.. what normal person goes out on CHRISTMAS EVE to get his woman a gift?

Don’t answer that!

He finally comes back and tells me to NOT look in the back seat of the wagon. Ok. Find. A Dryer wouldn’t fit in the back seat of the wagon anyway.

I tell him that I hope he didn’t look in the back of the wagon because two of his gifts were back there. I already know he didn’t because he’s just oblivious to everything and like a typical man, if it isn’t right in front of his face, he doesn’t see it.

At first he says no.. but I convince him that they would be a bitch to wrap and he concedes only if he can give me one of mine. Yea.. sure.. whatever.

So I bring him in the braiser and stock pot he’s been drooling over for the past 6 months at the restaurant supply place and his reaction was just like the one I would have when I woke up Christmas morning and found a functioning dryer down my basement with a big red bow on it.

He’s all happy and I’m all happy that he’s all happy.

So he tells me to close my eyes and then tells me to open them. When I do, he has a box with this in it:

He tells me that he just SO wants to be done with the divorce and marry me on a cruise to Jamaica.

And yeah, I did the whole misty eyed girl thing because I actually am a girl and you know.. so who cares that he has an alternative reason for wanting our destination to be Jamaica..

So we go home and I’m still looking for signs around the house that SOMEONE had delivered and installed a dryer on CHRISTMAS EVE!! But nope. Nothing.

Christmas morning comes and I’m still hoping upon hope that the gift bag from him sitting under the tree has like, one of those doll house dryers in it. Cause, yknow, that’s something I would do if the situation was reverse.

But no. It was a Tom Tom. Now why the HELL he would get me a Tom Tom is beyond me because I’ve told him countless times that I didn’t see a use for them and would much rather rely on an old fashioned map if I got lost somewhere.

Which seldom happens because I’m good with directions and shit like that.

But .. yknow.. guess it’s that whole MALE LISTENING THING AND THEIR INABILITY TO DO THAT!

And so I didn’t get a dryer for Christmas.. and in fact, still don’t have one because we got into a financial hole because of Christmas and because my unemployment ran out.

But all of the above wouldn’t be nearly a FRACTION as bad if the following conversation held in the car the day after Christmas had never taken place:

CHIEF: You know, I rode up and down the Pike trying to figure out what to get you. I stopped here.. I stopped there.. I stopped at this other place.

ME: (Choking on the smoke that I had just inhaled) WHAT?

CHIEF: Yea.. omg.. you’re SO hard to buy for.

ME: W.H.A.T??????

CHIEF: I know you say your so easy to buy for because you like anything but that actually puts a lot more pressure on a person.

ME: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME YOU MORON?

CHIEF: Geez, Leese.. what are you getting so strung out about?

ME: Did I not tell you I wanted a dryer? The ONLY fucking time I EVER told you what I wanted and you spent HOW MANY HOURS trying to figure out what to get me??

CHIEF: Did you really want it that bad?

ME: You’re an idiot

I’m keeping my fingers crossed for Valentine’s Day .. and for the sake of male solidarity, I suggest all you men out there do the same thing.

You figure out who is who!!

Bubba .. Weed.. and Spaz

This was taken Christmas Day night at Bird’s house.

Yes.. Weed was with us.

Yes.. Bubba is really that big for 15

Yes.. Spaz could play a part in Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory if he were blue.

This is the only picture that I have :: after 3 years :: of all three of them together so I thought I’d share.

Back To Blogging!!

Posted: January 19, 2010 in Just Stuff
Tags: , , ,

Damn…

I cannot tell you HOW glad I am that the holidays are over. They were rough. Too much running around at the last minute.. too must stressing over who was getting what and where we were going to go for dinner :: who the hell KNEW we were so damn popular!! :: .. and all kinds of craziness!

But all that’s over with and now it’s back to the hum-drum of daily reality show quality life!!

I apologize for not keeping up on my commenting on my Blogger Buddies posts and not replying to comments on here. I promise I will do that.. like RIGHT NOW!