My Breaking Point

Last night, I was past the point of breaking. The straw had finally brought the camel to it’s knees.

When I stopped at the shop after work, Bubba was there. Chief had said that Bubba had been a real help to him in the shop and to me, it sounded like what he was really saying was SEE!!! MY SON IS NOT A FUCKED UP SELFISH BASTARD!!

But to me? You don’t get props for doing what your supposed to do so I was unmoved.

It was right after 6pm when Spaz showed up complaining that he was STAAAAAAARVING. Mind you, this kid sat in the house all day probably playing video games and eating Easter candy.

Chief told them both that they couldn’t stay at the shop. He’s told them time and time again that they couldn’t hang there after 6 because he needed to clean and mop and they just get in the way.

Spaz grabbed something to eat and left but Bubba was still hanging around. Chief told him that he HAD. TO. GO. and Bubba response was that he didn’t want to go home because there was nothing to do there.

NOTE: Awww… Poor Baby

So Chief was like … Find, you can help me take out the trash.

Trash pick-up is Tuesdays and Fridays. There was no trash pick up on Good Friday so there was double the amount of trash and boxes that needed to be carried through the shop since the yard is completely enclosed with no exit. The shop generates alot of trash anyway but on top of that, it’s been pouring steadily for the last few days so it was a messy, disgusting job.

I was sitting out of the way in the kitchen playing COD5.. Bubba was in the front of the shop and Chief had grabbed a few bags of trash.

I heard him give the bags to Bubba and tell him to take them outside so I thought Bubba was helping him.

It finally dawned on me that I didn’t hear anything but Chief so I asked him if Bubba was helping him. He dropped the bag he was carrying on the floor and said.. No. The lazy bastard left. I asked him if he wanted me to help and he said he would appreciate it so I did. I told him that I thought Bubba was still around and he stared a tirade about how lazy he is, etc.

We picked up pizza for dinner and when we got home, I lost my appetite.

Apparently, Bubba had left his Easter bag on the floor next to the couch and the puppy got all into it. And Bubba left the majority of it all over the floor… Easter grass, candy wrappers, balls of little foil… What he DID pick up he tried picking up with the vacuum and so now… yet another vacuum is broke because the idiot just didn’t notice that nothing was getting sucked into the CLEAR CONTAINER right? .. There was crap all over the dining room table.. a million glasses in the sink.. crap all over the counters in the kitchen..

Mind you.. I cleaned everything Sunday night. It took them less then 20 hours later!

I told Chief that I was just going into the bedroom.. that I couldn’t be out there. He went out to get pizza and came back in the bedroom while I had my head buried so deep in my laptop that there’s F G H J K L imprinted on my forehead.

He didn’t say anything to me and I didn’t say anything to him. At 10pm, I said… Are you going to tell them to go to bed? It’s 10.

So he gets up and go out to the living room and even though I can hear them complaining and Chief hollaring, I couldn’t hear exact words.

He comes back in and not 3 minutes goes by when Bubba knocked on the door asking if I had bought the Puffs with Lotion tissues he asked for earlier.

I told him I forgot and would have left it at that had the dogs not needed dry food and Chief and I cigarettes.

So I leave the bedroom but when I get out into the living room it looks worse then it did before… pillows hanging half off the couch.. blankets all over the floor.. curtains moved.. stuffed animal stuffing all over.. MORE candy wrappers.

I tell Bubba that he needs to straighten up before I come back from the store. He said fine.

I come back from the store and Bubba is wrapped up like a burrito in a sheet on the couch… with nothing touched.

Right then, it felt like a cannon ball slammed into my gut.

He takes the tissues and goes up to his room. No thank you. No nothing.

And I set about cleaning and straightening.. again.. but this time I couldn’t hold the tears back.. I couldn’t hold the sobs.. I usually scream in silence but not this time.

Not that it mattered.. because everybody was sleeping. Chief included.

The frustration was what made me write the SECRETS post last night.

I couldn’t lay next to him in bed.. didn’t want to hear him snoring.. didn’t want to be anywhere near him so I went into my organized living room and enjoyed my 52″ tv until 1:30 this morning.

I intended on sleeping out there but I needed to stretch out so I went into the bedroom. Chief was still snoring away and didn’t wake up when I got into bed.
He was on one side, I was on the other..
and that’s the way it stayed.