The MisGuided Plans of a Crack Whore

Posted: March 4, 2009 in Drama
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

… so y’know, a big part of being with Chief is dealing with his crack whore ex. I probably wrote about her in a previous post some where back but if you’re just getting familiar with the store of my life then here’s the thumbnail:

Chief married her because she was pregnant. They subsequently went on to have two more kids who may .. or may not .. be his. She has a seventh grade education and never had to work while they were married. All the free time on her hands let to the devil’s workshop and she started doing drugs which turned into stripping, prostitution and an x-rated website. At the time he was working 20 hours a day and 24 hours on the weekends trying to build a business and it was only because he came home unexpectedly one night that he found everything out. She decided she didn’t want to be a mother any more and left. She went on to become deeper involved in drugs to the extent that she was arrested on a felony burglary charge and did a stint in jail.

I’m smart enough to know that that’s HIS side of the story and she more then likely has her own… of which I have no desire to know.

I never place judgement on people second hand and it’s only by the things I’ve witnessed her doing and saying that I really don’t want to be anywhere near her universe. Unfortunately, there are kids involved so there really isn’t much that I can say in the matter.

Would I prefer them not be around her? Of course. She lives in a two room apartment that is paid for by her “friend”, has a boyfriend who is into heroin and pills and at the time Chief was arrested, was staying at her place even though he was a fugitive from the law. She has consistently made promises to Spaz that she has broken and only cares about herself and not the well being of her kids.

She’s been ordered to pay 43.00 a week child support but doesn’t pay anything until the court calls her on it and then she’ll go to the courthouse with a couple hundred bucks in her hand to avoid arrest.

In fact, the last time they went to court in September, the judge told Chief that the next time she doesn’t pay to contact the court and she’ll be arrested. She never did.. and he never did.

I don’t know why.. but I have my own theories that I don’t want to go into it. I’ll only say this.. Chief can be a real pussy about things sometimes and this is one of them.

But the day he was arraigned and she offered to be by my side in solidarity, I knew that she only wanted to know what was going on because she was hatching her own plan. As I said in a previous post, I used her because she knew the ropes and I didn’t.

My feeling was confirmed when we where sitting in the back waiting to get my withdrawal.

That’s a whole OTHER story about why I couldn’t get it but suffice to say that the branch manager really dogged it for me and I was able to get the whole amount.

While we were sitting there, she said, “.. yknow, I’m going to have to go to the courthouse. I already called my case worker about emergency housing but I’ll wait until his preliminary is over”

I told her she had to do what she had to do but I knew at some point, because of this, she was going to try and go for custody.

My suspicions were confirmed later on that night when Bubba said that she was telling him and Spazz that she was “going to get her boys back” and she couldn’t wait until they lived with her. That Chief was going to have to pony up child support and that I couldn’t do anything about it. That she was going to get half the store.

I told Bubba.. and subsequently Spaz.. that basically, she was an uneducated junkie who had no clue about what was going on and what was going to happen.

First of all, their dad wasn’t going to jail. Secondly, even if he DID, then how was she suppose to get child support from a prisoner? Third of all, there is no “half” of the store AND if there was a threat that he was going to jail then the shop would either close OR it would be solely in my name therefore she wouldn’t be entitled to nothing just like I wouldn’t be entitled to be their custodian. The last thing I told them was that if she thinks that their emergency housing would be in a fru-fru neighborhood then she has another thought coming because they would be plucked right in the middle of any number of ghettos.

She’s looking for a payout. She doesn’t work.. has someone else covering her bills and thinks that having the boys means she’s on easy street. This line of thinking torments Spaz.. who is already messed up mentally because of the shit she has put him through in his ten years. Her saying this to him frazzles his brain into thinking that he’s going to lose his comfort.

I have my problems with Spaz but at least I understand why he is the way he is and give him the attention that he has lacked from her all these years.

Things really came to a head a few weekends ago when Spaz was suppose to stay over there overnight and within an hour, he called up to have me pick him up. She started texting me saying that he needs discipline and that that will change soon because there are big surprises in the works.

When we picked Spaz up, you can tell he is tormented. When pressed, he said that she said that she wasn’t going to let a stranger off the street (me) raise them. He told her that I wasn’t the stranger, SHE was and she went off.
This is the same woman who wound up doing shots in the bar across the street from her apartment the first night she had them when Chief was arrested because she “couldn’t take them anymore” and “needed a break”.

So yea.. she’s really equipped to have them full time.

Chief is unfazed by all this. There’s no way, he said, that she could get custody. I told him that up until January 7th, I didn’t think he would get arrested for something he didn’t do and he did.. so I wasn’t trusting anything anymore. AND I got bent that she was saying all this and he wasn’t doing anything like.. say.. contact the court that she hasn’t been paying support.

In my world, if you push me in a corner I’m fighting back. If you try to fuck me then I’m going to fuck you. HE had the means to do it and I questioned him on why he hasn’t. He never really gave me an answer but did wind up filing. Their court date is at the end of March.

What I did tell all three of them was that if she did get custody, then there wasn’t going to be the revolving door like there was years ago. If she had custody.. then she had custody. No “go over and sleep at your fathers” and no phone call saying that she couldn’t deal with them … like she’s called a few hundred times in the path when she had them.. If she was going to have custody.. and if he was going to have to pay support then that was all the money she was going to get. No extra money for shoes, pants, schoolbags, etc.

At least not from my check.

Bubba’s response was “.. why do we have to suffer” and my response was that that’s the way she wants it and to ask her. If she wants to upset the apple cart then I wasn’t going to do the clean up.

They’re both at an age where I believe they would be able to tell a judge who they wanted to live with. I know Spaz would want to stay here. Bubba is another story but he’ll have to understand that once the order is issued, it is what it is and he no longer benefits by living under my room.

I know it may sound bitchy but if she was the type of person who actually DID put her kids first, then she wouldn’t be doing and saying what she is and things would be different. She wouldn’t be trying to benefit from all this. She wouldn’t be trying to use this situation to her advantage.

There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for those kids BUT I’m not going to let HER take advantage of me and of the situation.

Chief may be a pussy when it comes to her and the kids but I don’t have that kind of loyalty or attachment and if she thinks I’m going to lay down and be rolled over well… she really doesn’t know what kind of a person I really am.

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